My Children. My Opinions. My Tales.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

I may be down but I'm not defeated

I really don't enjoy complaining about the bad happenings in my life, but sometimes it just makes me feel better to get it out, kind of setting it free...a little cleansing of the soul.

It has been a tough week for me. I have struggled much of this week with whether or not to share this on the blog, but it does affect the rest of my household, as it does my writing on here. I am unemployed for the first time in my life. My company of 4 years gave the employees the option of leaving, voluntarily, or a possible in-voluntary lay-off. It was a decision that my hubby and I struggled with for about a month.

So, here I am searching daily for a new job, praying that an opportunity, the right opportunity will present itself, soon...I do have one job offer, but it requires long-distance travel, which wouldn't be a problem if the gas prices weren't at "OMG" levels.

I have faith that, with my qualifications and skills, I will find something's just that the unknown for me is a little scary.

It has been tough on hubby and Jelly bean too.

Hubby has now taken on the responsibility of taking Jelly to day care and picking her up. It is hard for him, not because he has a tough time dropping her off, but it is at my old-place-of-work. He said he feels like, he has, in a sense, lost me...I guess because so many that I had met and talked to along the way, they all inquire about how I am...and maybe give him the "sad-pity" look.

We thought it be best to keep Jelly in day care for as long as possible, giving me the opportunity to concentrate on getting a job, and also to keep things somewhat similar for her. She seems to be doing ok, though, a couple days have been tough for her. I ask her about it last night...

"Are you sad that mommy isn't with you at day care?"
"Yes. I sad."
"I am sad too, but Daddy really loves taking you and picking you up."
"I want mommy and daddy to pick me up! And Tobee too."

Even in tough times, she still makes me smile. Which reminds me, most importantly, "I may be down, but I am not defeated."

We will be ok...everything will be ok.


Natalie said...

I know that the right job is out there just waiting for you and that the doors will open in God's timing. In the meantime, enjoy this time with your daughter and the beautiful summer weather.

Sheri said...

I agree. Another door will open for you. I will be praying for you.

Carey said...


Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Ok I typed out a whole comment to you only to accidentally delete it. :-( I'm sorry you're having to job search - it stinks! And it always feels like forever. :-( :-( :-( I hope the perfect thing turns up and quickly.